Smiling like a fool. There are so many good things going on right now. I now own a glow-in-the-dark Nalgene bottle. I ate Cinnamon Toast Crunch. I sat and talked with PSP for an hour or so over some tea and learned a lot. There are so many wonderful opportunities and chances and races that I can’t help my pulse quickening.
There was a point where I would joke around about being in love with running. How my heart races and hands get clammy and butterflies erupt in my stomach.
Racing at the Olympic Trials is so real and possible. This can happen if I get over my fear of myself. It’s a strange thing to be scared of- all of your capabilities. It’s especially prevalent in Type A Personalities, Stanford students, et cetera. This fear of what you’re able to do, and the possibility of failure. But I’m beginning to see that failing at something is a way to learn. And I’m ready to get over it.
It’s so hard to focus on the tasks at hand (read: Calc homework and drinking water) and my mind is expanding in so many directions.
I’m sorry I’m so lame and incessantly talking about “learning about myself.” If it continues, you have permission to throw things at me or something.
There are just so many things right now.
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